July 26, 2015
Getting Adjusted In Federal Prison
I have been here for 5 days now. The first day was a little tense. New place, new faces and new rules to learn. I live on the second floor and share a 4 bunk room with only one other bunky. She is a wonderful helpful lady that has been here for a while and unless she wins ger appeal will be here several years even after I leave. I have been received well by the other ladies in my building. They have all proven to be extremely helpful and kind. The stereotypes that we are shown on tv and hear from those that have not been in a federal women’s prison has yet to be validated. Before coming in I was extremely apprehensive and quite frankly anxious. But I prayed every step of the way. God put me with a good pool of women.
Texas is extremely hot. Thank God for an air conditioned building! The problem is everything that I have to do is in the main building and its a little hike! I have not walked this much since i was in high school. I have not eaten sweets since I surrendered. But let me share this there is no shortage of delicacies because the talented and creative women of Carswell can make the most creative meals and deserts. Last night various groups were having a cheesecake bakeoff. There are no microwaves only hot water. There are no refrigerators only the creativity of using the ice machines. My first night here I thought I would have to resort to nibbling small pieces of my arm. That’s how hungry I was. Luckily, one of the ladies so graciously shared with me a pack of ramien noodles. I mixed them with some lemon juice and I thought I had ordered carryout from olive garden.
Being here for this short time has caused me to search deep inside my soul and ask God for contentment, peace and joy despite my imprisonment. Although I am imprisoned in my mind I am NOT a prisoner. I pray, read my scriptures and meditate. I am in constant thought about how I can make myself a better person as I serve my sentence. Next week I will be signing up for classes. Trust me I am being very methodical and strategic as to what classes and activities I engage in. Everything I do has to be in alignment with positivity and not negativity. The classes I take in take in federal prison will have to offer a tangible benefit as I prepare for my eventual completion of my time.
The lesson for today is faith. Everyday I must renew and rejuvenate my faith. I do not look at the totality of the time I must be here instead I focus on filling my days with activities that will assist me as I successfully navigate the waters at the Carswell Federal Medical Center as inmate number 19677-026.
You’re going to get skinny very quickly with the heat the walking and no sweets. Don’t worry. I’ll make you a big batch of homemade strawberry ice cream when you come home. Miss you already
So Ramen noodles are a delicacy now???????? Make it do what it do. Love you sis. Stay hydrated with all those extreme temperatures down there. Big hugs, love ya????
Thank YOU for finding a way to help those of US worried and missing you. The blog is a great idea. I’m sending prayers and positive energy your way. Love you. 🙂
Hi Roxy – miss you so much! Hate I did not get the chance to connect with you before you left. But I am so touched by your positive attitude. Sometimes when something is personally concerning me I think about how you carried yourself and how strong your faith was/is -even in the midst of what you knew you were facing – and it makes my own Faith stronger. So thank you for that 🙂 I am so glad you are writing this blog from your new “temporary digs” and I am going to follow your journey because – as we always discussed – “you still need to decide what you are going to do with the rest of your life.” Continue to keep the Faith my friend. I am sure your will continue to have positive relationships with the women there because you are such a good person. And although I know you are gonna come out of there a “skinny minny” – the first place you and I are going is to get those cupcakes and to have that lunch we kept trying to have but never had the chance to get to! Cant wait !!!!! God bless you Roxy! Kat
Rox,
Please don’t eat your arm! 🙂 Use those creative juices for when you come home! Miss you much!
God’s continued blessings to you!
Love,
Pamela
Hi Roxy
I am so sorry we did not get together before the 22nd. I am thinking of you and praying that the Lord will pour out an abundance of peace and joy on you. ☺. Let me know if I am able to send or do anything for you.
Love you
Often times I want to fuss at you, many times I want to hug you. Today, I want to remind you that you are NOT a prisoner nor inmate. The title and assignment given you by man is NOT your identity. You are serving a blessed purpose, as an anointed messenger from God. ALWAYS remember that every journey in our lives is not always just for us. Often times we are a vessel to enlighten, strengthen, teach, guide, influence and direct others. I believe in my heart that this particular journey for you has this purpose. When you finish that infamous book, you will clearly see what I mean. I am proud of you, I support you and I thank you for sharing this experience that many will never understand. Skinny girl, I love you. 🙂