September 20, 2014
Writing Openly About Your Criminal History
The old stoic Seneca urged the Romans to retire early so they could “find themselves.” That was prison for me. I found myself through reading, running, and writing.
Writing openly about my crime not only helped me come to terms with my conviction, it helped me stay connected to the world, and it helped me prepare for life upon release. Rather than spending my days lamenting over how my life had fallen apart, I took action. Naturally, there were moments I wanted to quit, but I also grew determined to accept reality, and to squeeze out every kernel of experience this prison term had to offer. Running helped, so did reading, but nothing trumped writing.
My writing career started a few months into my term when I began writing down whatever was going through my mind. I began securing moments in my life that could never be recaptured. I did it for posterity and me. My first blog from Taft Federal Prison (that has mysteriously gone missing) in October 2008 was the beginning. Since then I have written more than 100,000 published words. Each blog posting or book I wrote proved to me that I could become stronger through difficulty. May men talk about doing it, but too few follow through. Sleepwalking through your prison term is certainly one strategy. I would get more involved.
For years before my surrender to prison I shut out friends, family, and business associates thinking if I ignored them this would all go away. I only made matters worse. Paradoxically, writing openly about my crimes put me on the path back to success. Writing provided me an opportunity to both take back control of my life and reframe the narrative the Department of Justice had owned. Who owns your narrative?
Justin Paperny
