“Everything is going to be okay.” In a visit with my Fiance’, family and friends, a man stopped next to us. He was there visiting another inmate and felt this need to share these supporting words. It threw me off, being totally unexpected, he shared and went on his way. This moment from last year came back to my mind today. Looking at these past 16 months, when this challenge began, wondering how this man knew it would all be Ok.

Some things that happen to us, in our lives, can seem only impossible events to our past self. Things we would never imagine, nor would we even think to ponder on. In disbelief, we look around. Waiting for the planet to stop moving on its never ending course, and remain still for just a moment. To acknowledge the chaos that has taken place. It is possible this is all a bad dream. I will wake up with everything back to “normal.” All will be ok- or so we tell our self. What does this mean, “it will be ok.” Somehow this time will pass, and our future self will find solace. Or shall we move beyond the distress to find that happiness again. Will we be bestowed by luck of good fortune, of love and a vision to have found the good amongst the destruction. The growth towards betterment, pulling ourselves from the rubble of pain and confusion. Peering out the thin cracks of joy that find their way in through the dense absence of light, is it all going to be ok?

Curling up in the corner of our own prison cell of pain we find some comfort in the loneliness and self pity. Its the tears that begin to wash away the seemingly countless pounds pressing down, driving us into a grave we could possibly wish to visit, if just for a temporary escape from it all. We then begin to see the world around us in a new light. The sun is brighter and sharper, the wind is stronger, and our lungs fill with fresher air. Calculating the constant movements surrounding us we step through each day as though in a chess game, ever so careful with each step along the way. What is the purpose of this? How do we find it? Is our life to work and pay our self created debts and taxes? To acquire more things? To see and be seen in the pop culture of hot spots and destinations. Is it to melt into a coma-state-of-mind absorbing advertisements and the modern likes of the masses? Watching others of whom seem to have some creative importance. All through our sleek high res phablet, recording each second of our daily existence. Giving us guidance, a path to follow. As our rechargeable all knowing God we bow, we detach from the boring thing once called life.

George Orwell would cringe at the destitute control we have to disconnect from a constant electrical wave of 1’s and 0’s. Its beyond our own capacity to out think this device we hold so dear to our chest, as an extension of who we are, which contains greater technological power than the first ship to space that brought man on our moon. A negative utopia emerges from the “idea” of living. Is it living as one could conceive or is it better to announce we are alive with a false conception of living? Do we see Truth in times of uncontrollable pains that fill our body more clearly than in the times of great comfort and pleasure? Do we become complacent in the efforts of giving Love until the sky screams down on us that all is lost and hopeless and the end is near —? Does one decide to live once revealed of the remaining days to come?

No one can deny the power of Love once one has come to hold it- like a treasure buried deep within, at the bottom depths of the ocean of our soul lies this magical chest. Locked up, chained down, to possibly never see the light of day. Our world continues along its path, finding a way of of happiness, and meaning of the sort.

Only if this treasure chest could be discovered. The One person in this world somehow finds us and begins to explore who we are. We draw protection, instinctively, to protect what’s inside. To protest against acts of displaying love and affection out as the true levels of meaning they hold. May these actions not be accepted by those I live to please? Shall I break free and live? Or shall I follow the socially correct? Leaving all at surface value to easily replace one with the next swipe right of our hand, waving on to the next flimsy idea of a relationship. Its the when if only “the one” who holds the map and key comes into our life, a hurricane blasting of power, an explosion erupts inside of us. Reaching the big X, our treasure, all in life begins to shift.

The lock is cracked free, emitting a stream of unknown foreign emotions shifting our track of life. Love happens, in its true form, in all its purity and infinite courage it drives us to a new way of life. It is what has the power to pull us from the corner of our prison cell, elevates us, and washes the remnant of unbearable pains nothing else could cure. Love is the treasure of life- it separates all else, it moves mountains, it shows us our true inner self. It never dies. It goes on forever. It gives a Purpose to even the most abhorrent of times in our life. To have a string to our heart, a single thread of love attached to the inner most sacred place of us in our heart. It has the power to show us what is our Truth. To give it, to receive it, to share it, to grow it, understand it, and know its godlike power. To know it as “The All” in life shall lead us to the heavens of true joy, pleasure, and greatness. It is contagious to those who get hit with the ripples created in moments of Loving, to all around us. Those so blessed to experience this environmental energy of true Love, let alone to experience first hand. It makes it all OK. With LOVE, everything is going to be Okay. Its going to be OK.

Jim Vani

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