Etika LLC — Ethical Prison Consultants

The Gray Area

by David Applegate | Oct 22, 2014 | Blog, David Applegate

October 22, 2014

I am very fortunate to have a huge network of friends and colleagues – many of whom I have met in the many cities we have lived in (and the many companies I have worked for!). The experts say that when you find yourself in a situation like I currently find myself in, you find out who your real friends are. I have said before that I am a true believer that many good things come out of terrible situations. One of the great things that has come out of this is that I have been truly blown away by the support and genuine positive wishes I have received from almost every one of my friends and colleagues. I have always tried to be someone who puts positive energy out into the world, who is quick to give a well-deserved compliment or offer help to a friend or colleague who needs it. And I really feel that positive energy coming back to me now and I want everyone to know how very grateful I am for that. Many of these conversations and exchanges have been deeply moving and very cathartic but one thread that has run through many of these conversations has surprised me. A number of people have told me that they don’t judge me, and in fact are deeply sympathetic, because it could have been them in my shoes at one point or another in their lives. A surprising number of them – all of whom I consider good people – have told me they operated in the gray area or done things when they were younger that could have gotten them in trouble and maybe even landed them in prison. I’m not saying I don’t deserve prison time – quite the contrary – but as we all know, justice can be inconsistent (even in these great United States). One of the keys of course is to stay out of the grey area – especially if operating in the grey area leads to greater success for the individual or the company. I plan to spend a great deal of time in the next weeks and months contemplating how I got where I am. I already have a lot of thoughts on that and I am sure that I will have additional insights once I am serving my sentence and my mind is no longer cluttered with preparing for prison. I will share those insights in the hopes that others can avoid going down the path that I went down. Stay tuned!

bad decisions, criminal justice system, incarceration, introspection, gray area

3 Comments

  • Sandy MayerOct 23, 2014

    Hi David, You bring up so many good points. I really think that all of us who work(ed) in industry have operated in the "gray area" at one time or another. I have experienced companies working in that area quite a bit. Sometimes I think we fall under the misconception that a "white lie" is ok in some circumstances. I cetainly have experienced that.

    You always impressed me as an ethical, moral and positive person. I certainly felt that when I worked for you. By the way you are handling this situtaion continues to impress me. Accepting resonsibiity for ones actions is one of the hardest lessons to learn. I know I hve worked really hard for my sons to understand and accept this. You have turned your experience into a learning one and not only you but all of us will benefit.

    While you are thinking about all of this, please consider writing a book about your througts and experiences. I know your insight with help others.

    The hugs bank is full for you always.

    Sandy

  • Eric GillettOct 23, 2014

    For myself, I question the idea of a "gray area." I think I know when I am not doing the right thing. If it doesn't smack me in the solar plexus, it just feels bad, something in my gut. So why do I do it? I rationalize it out of fear. Years ago I had an affair. That was no gray area. But I told myself I was entitled to this relationship for all that I put up with in my marriage. I rationalized it. Funny how my ex-wife didn't agree with my rationalization. She rationalized me right out the door.

    I'm afraid of thinking in shades of gray. If I do, then white lies are ok, they're gray. A little larceny is ok, its gray. No, I think I'll stick with my gut and fight my battles on the field of rationalization. Hopefully, when I know its wrong, its wrong, black, gray, or white, and I just do the next right thing.

    • David ApplegateOct 24, 2014

      Thanks for your post, Rick. It might be different in the highly regulated medical fields that I have worked in versus the legal field you have worked in. I don't presume to know the issues you faced in the law firms in which you worked. Medical device and pharma companies are highly regulated and publicly traded companies even more so. Many of the regulations are confusing and many people - especially in smaller to mid-sized companies - are not aware of many of the regulations. Even when you are aware, it is sometimes hard to know where the line is and when you are pushing the envelope too far - especially when the goal is noble (e.g., greater patient access to medical therapies that can relieve suffering). Risk taking is often encouraged and that can cause it's own problems.