October 13, 2014
I spoke with my parents a few more times on the phone, expressing the importance of fighting this until I'm completely exonerated of all alleged accusations of drug abuse. As I said before, the punishment I'm currently serving is unwanted, but it's the very least of all my problems. I've worked very hard these last three years to be trusted as a man, one that's free from the use of substances and now that's all being compromised by someone or something beyond my control. What if it is my medication that caused this false positive for THC, then that means it could very well happen again, either here in prison, or even worse, it could happen after my release, during one of my scheduled parole visits and if it's not documented and proven that this is a factor, then I could be sent back to prison for another 2 1/2 years for something I have no control over. I busted my butt these last three years, changing my life around, metamorphosizing into a man of honesty and sobriety and now I feel so helpless, with no control over the fate of my future circumstances, all because of some screwed up urine screening. Even after three years of recovery and daily documented hard work, living my life in prison as an open book for all to read, holding myself accountable to all choices, I can't possibly imagine having to start all over again. Thankfully my parents agreed to seek legal help for me in this matter, which has to mean that even though this is hard to believe for them, at least they want to believe me and they have a little more faith than they would have years ago. Now that is a clear sign of my hard work paying off. My goal is to get someone up here to pull a hair sample, showing proof of multiple months of sobriety. Hearing that I now have a lawyer certainly sets my mind at ease. I know that once I'm placed on cell isolation come Monday my phone privileges, visitations and video visits will all be taken away from me as punishment, my only form of communication will have to be through mail/email, then I'll really have to depend on help from others, trusting that something is being done for me.
Steven Dybvad
