Thursday, November 27th, 2008
Happy Thanksgiving!
Although I am here for 7 months, I haven't adjusted to holidays in prison. I presumed when I self-surrendered in April that I'd grow more comfortable as the holidays passed. Today is the first separation from my wonderful family for Thanksgiving and I'm grateful it will be my last. I'm amazed how well other inmates adjust. The holiday meal and bonanza of action movies may help them cope. For me, holidays only intensify the loneliness and feelings of separation because I miss my family. Despite my sadness, I was determined to treat today like any other Thursday and I felt the holiday would pass faster by adhering to my daily routine. Early this morning I ran 10 miles in the rain. In the afternoon I tutored two inmates who are studying for their GED. (There was a minor problem when I needed to tutor algebra). Then, I mopped the floors. After that I had dinner - salmon, brown rice, tomatoes and onion - in the large TV room. During dinner I pondered the state of my financial affairs and, in particular, my court ordered restitution.
I've made it clear to anyone who asks that I intend to pay my restitution in full. To support this promise, I contributed $100,000 dollars at sentencing. I was not asked to contribute any money, nor were any of my assets seized or sold by the government. My contribution came from liquidating a retirement account and was done solely to demonstrate my commitment to the victims whom I hurt. I knew the prosecution would recommend 24 months whether I made a payment or not.
I continue to feel remorse and shame for my behavior. I played a significant role in luring hard working people into investing into a fraudulent hedge fund. I helped turn investors into victims. As a Vice-President at UBS, I had a fiduciary duty to protect them. I needed to let them know their money was safe. For my own selfish reasons I conveniently looked the other way while they were being misled. I knew they would lose money and I directly contributed to their pain. For this I am so sorry and deeply regret my actions. I blame no one but myself and would do things differently if I could.
