WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 10, 2008
As a federal prisoner at Taft Camp, I've come to learn that living in denial is a common response for white collar offenders. It seems few men want to accept that they engaged in behavior that prosecutors deemed criminal. While in prison, I've met mortgage brokers, judges, lawyers, bankers and businessmen who initially responded to signs that their world was about to crumble with decisions that compounded their troubles. Had I known more about how those dramas unfold, I would have chosen to respond differently.
For several years I was utterly incapable of acknowledging that I was complicitous in a financial crime that contributed to the loss of millions of dollars. I desperately wanted to change the direction of my life, yet I could not begin to heal until I conceded that my actions were fraudulent. People had been hurt as a consequence of my blind pursuit of higher commission earnings. I spent nearly a quarter of a million dollars in legal fees before I could make the aforementioned statement.
My healing began once I finally accepted responsibility. In time, I found value in the catharsis that came with my honesty. I wish more men at Taft Camp would do the same. I'm convinced their prison experience would improve. Prison, despite all of its madness, has also helped me heal. I'm using a significant portion of my time for introspection. By addressing where I'd gone wrong, I'm able to take corrective actions. I'll always wish I'd accepted responsibility sooner. I'd be home rebuilding my life while contributing financially to the victims I helped defraud. I truly hope others can learn from my mistakes.
