LIVE FOR TODAY?
When I was working as an attorney in the real world I lived my life harboring regrets over past choices and experiencing fear over what the future would hold. Now that I am in prison, I continue to live the same way. Face it, No one wants to be in prison. To escape the daily reality of prison life, I find myself analyzing the past and worrying about the future. It seems allot easier than experiencing the here and now.
This is no way to live. I need to learn how to forget about my past, but not before extracting the valuable lessons it can teach me. I have made bad choices. I have made stupid mistakes. I cannot continue to relive these regrettable moments or they will consume me.
I also have to avoid living in the future. In prison, I feel like my life has been placed on pause. I feel it will recommence once I step outside the gate. As a result, I sit and daydream about the future all of the time. This daydreaming seeds worry and self-doubt. Will I get a decent job? Will my friends still accept me? Am I too old to start over?
The answer to this quandary is to take care of today. If I am positive and productive today, Tomorrow will take care of itself.
I am trying to learn how to live in the moment.
Where are you living?
Ken Flaska
