October 21, 2008
Rebuilding a Once Constructive Life Inside Federal Prison
I previously wrote that I was blessed with a privileged adolescence. My parents reared my brother and me in the affluent community of Encino in Southern California. I attended private school from the elementary level through high school and was fortunate to play on baseball teams that traveled across the country. After graduation from USC, the privileged life continued. I accepted a position to join the Los Angeles office of Bear Stearns and even fielded a call from the legendary Ace Greenberg who headed the firm. Top brokers at the Swiss banking giant recruited me from Bear Stearns with a substantial signing bonus when I was 25 years old. Shortly after depositing the large bonus check I asked my brother, “Should it be this easy?”
With so much success coming my way so easily and fluidly, I didn’t take the time to appreciate my success. If anything, I expected and demanded more and slowly began to compromise my ethics and values. I felt entitled to the privileges that came my way. Then, like an unexpected punch in the mouth, prosecutors knocked me into a new reality.
As I struggled through the judicial process I felt as if my life were over. I had everything going for me yet, in an instant, all was lost. My parents were exposed to the indignities of Department of Justice press releases and Los Angeles Times’ articles depicting their son as a criminal.
I felt abandoned by some friends. In retrospect, it simply may have been my humiliation that caused me to neglect them. I began to also neglect my health by overeating and feeling sorry for myself.
That life of privilege may have been suspended with my incarceration. I am convinced that I never took the time to appreciate the gifts of my life. This experience has been my wake up call and a second chance. My confinement has given me opportunities for introspection and a time to recalibrate the values by which I want to live. As I was spiraling through the abyss, it didn’t occur to me that it was in a prison where I would find my bearings. Now that nearly 6 months has passed, I feel as if the worst is behind me and I will emerge stronger, wiser and be prepared to prove myself worthy of the privileges to which I was born.
Justin Paperny
