November 18, 2014

Bathroom Logic From Federal Prison

Using the Bathroom facilities in prison can create issues you never really considered in the real world. In my unit, we have 127 people competing for use of our facilities which were originally designed for 44 prisoners. We have four showers, four toilets, three urinals and five working sinks. Two of our sinks are inoperable because some fellow prisoners use them to wash their microwave oven dishes and clog them with food debris.(Gross).

Timing is always a key consideration for use of the facilities. Show up at a high traffic time and you will be waiting in line. I had a conversation today with my cube mates regarding the timing of bathroom use, and a more in depth discussion regarding which shower was the most desirable to use. It went something like this:

KEN; “I had cold water when I took my shower today and that is why I did not shave”

TOM; “You should have used the Handicap shower, it always has hot water.”

STAN; “Yes, but the Handicap shower has low water pressure.”

JEFF;(Eavesdropping one cube over) “Ken, I would use shower Number 2. It has great water pressure and it always has Hot water”.

I used shower number 2 and Jeff was right! Now, I just have to refine my timing technique.

This is what your life is reduced to in prison. Having discussions like the one above is an everyday occurrence!

It is so sad, you just have to laugh?

Ken Flaska

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