Friday, February 20, 2009
Eighty-Eight Days Until My Release From Taft Federal Prison Camp
Today I woke with a wonderful feeling, as if I’ve really made a contribution to society. These good feelings come from an opportunity I had yesterday to contribute to courses on corporate ethics that Professor Kelly Pope was leading at DePaul University in Chicago.
I had come into contact with Kelly through my friend Walt Pavlo, who was a leading speaker on the subject of ethics. Kelly and I exchanged a correspondence through which I introduced myself and explained the motivations behind the crimes I had committed as a stock broker with UBS. As an effort of full disclosure, I had sent Kelly all of the legal documents pertaining to my case.
After reviewing my work, Kelly and her students saw some value in gathering more data from me. She accepted the challenge of coordinating authorization from prison administrators at Taft Camp, then arranged a flight out to visit. Kelly was expecting, however, and her doctor advised that with a delivery scheduled for March, it would not be prudent for her to fly. She adjusted by coordinating several of her graduate students and teaching assistants to make the trip in her stead.
This was a real production, and I felt privileged to participate. Karen Chodzicki was a graduate student working toward her MBA, and she served in the capacity of interviewer. Along with Karen were two additional students who served as the film crew. Karen had come with a few pages of questions that she had put together with Kelly and others. Karen was going to lead the interview while the film crew recorded us both. Following her interview with me, Karen and the film crew were driving to Los Angeles in order to interview my mother, Tallie.
With the economic crisis plaguing our country, I understood that both academic and corporate leaders would need to expand the literature on the subject of ethics. I was happy to contribute in any way that seemed appropriate. As a former stockbroker with Bear Stearns and UBS, I had direct experience with the dichotomy that existed between published corporate ethics codes with the actual practices within the corporate culture. As a consequence of the continuous dilemma between ethics and compensation schedules presented in the professional environment of money management, headlines were showing that many in business were making the wrong decision. By exposing my own experiences and describing the humiliation I felt, I hoped to put a human face on the subject and help others make better decisions.
Neither Karen nor I had experience with filming such an interview before, but she was a true professional. While the camera crew was setting up the lighting equipment in a conference room, she chatted amicably with me to set my nerves at ease. She showed me the questions that had been prepared, and I understood at once that I could serve the project best by responding with both honesty and humility. Despite the cameras and attention, this was a project of shame. I had done wrong, used poor discretion, and broken criminal laws. The purpose was to convey my feelings of remorse, what had gone wrong within my sense of morality, and the price that these egregious errors in judgment I had made inflicted upon the victims, my family, and on society. Our objective was not to glamorize my status as a prisoner, but rather to help students and other audience members understand the consequences of ethical slides. I would serve as an example of a business professional who had made bad decisions.
Although I clearly understood that in participating with the interview I was exposing myself to relive the humiliating punishment of my conviction over and over again, I felt a kind of cleansing in telling my story and expressing my remorse. My dear mother would be augmenting the production by describing how my inappropriate actions had hurt her. This was an offer of atonement for me, to redeem my indiscretions by making this contribution to the study of ethics. In describing the prices I was paying for bad decisions, I hoped to provide others with the reasons to stay vigilant in their commitments to lead lives of honesty and integrity, consistent with the principles of good conduct. I felt grateful to Kelly, Karen, and all the others who brought me this opportunity to contribute.
