Getting Closer
January 24, 2016
I have noticed over the past few months that my relationships with several people I am close to have become signficantly deeper and richer. I find this to be a wonderful thing and I was curious to figure out why this has happened.
In my New Year's post, I mentioned that one of the things I have learned to do is to let go of expectations that things need to be a certain way in order for me to be happy. Not true! Well, I have found that this also applies to people and especially to people that I love! I have been letting go of thoughts and beliefs that people SHOULD or SHOULDN'T be a certain way or do certain things. People are the way they are - until they change and they aren't. There is nothing I can or SHOULD do about that! I actually used to think (and sometimes still do) that I know what is best for people and that feeling can be even stronger for people I care about. How arrogant is THAT???? It's very hard to let go of that because I think our minds are trained to equate love with wanting what is best for people. But do we REALLY know what is best for people? What I have found is that when I let go of that, it opens up space to actually unconditionally love that person which - yep - opens up room for growth and getting closer.
This becomes even more powerful for me when it is combined with me letting go of all my ideas of what I think people want me to be and being more honest with myself and with others. It's definitely hard to break all these habits and it's even a little scary to head into uncharted territory like that but for me, it's been worth it!
OK I could go on and on about this but since my last two posts were soooooooooooooo long, I'll end here!
As always, thanks for listening!
With love,
David