September 12, 2014
Self-surrender to Federal Prison
I’m days away from the big moment — having to self-surrender to federal prison. Thanks to people like Justin Paperny, I’ve been able to mentally prepare as much as possible. For the most part I know what to expect and anticipate. Sure, it will be a different story actually going on the journey but I’m confident that I’ve learned as much as I can about what to expect prior to actually experiencing it. This preparation has provided me a tremendous amount of relief and peace, allowing me to enter into an intimidating situation not full of ignorance but with eyes wide open.
While I am committed to blogging through my 24-month sentence, I can’t say undoubtedly that I’ll be able to do so unfettered. One of the realizations I’m going to have to come to grips with is that all of my correspondence – emails, phone calls, letters – will be monitored once I’m incarcerated. That means that my words will always be read by prison administrators and, if deemed “unsuitable”, will not see the light of day. I’m not sure if or how my words will be censored or screened going forward and I would certainly not try to write “in code” (a big no-no), but this may very well be my last post where I’m able to be 100% transparent and unguarded with my words.
It’s difficult to comprehend that this part of the journey is just beginning. Since the FBI was at my doorstep 10 months ago, it feels like it’s been an eternity. On the other hand, it also feels like it was just yesterday. I’m hoping that my time inside passes quickly but I’m also full of hope that I will not waste the next season of my life. I will come out a better man than when I entered… More sympathetic, closer to God, stronger, smarter and more discerning.